How watching my father struggle with diabetes affected me

My father had been a diabetic since before I was born. As a child, by the time I began to understand what was happening around me, I realised that my father was taking medicine a lot (at least 3 times a day). Whenever I asked anyone about it, they just told me that he was taking medicine because he wasn’t well.

It was only as a teenager that I really learned about diabetes, the ‘silent killer’. It was at this point that the doctors told me my father was a type 2 diabetic, his body wasn’t producing enough insulin, and his immune system was fragile.

My early learnings of diabetes

I understood early that diabetes was a chronic disease and couldn’t be cured.

Fortunately, my father was employed by a government PSU (public sector undertaking), so he had access to free regular hospital health checkups and a free monthly medicine supply. Every month, he used to go to the hospital for a checkup and come back with a big polythene bag with 1 month’s supply of medicine.

I shudder to think what would have happened if my father hadn’t been with a PSU, and was instead employed in the private sector. Having to buy so many medicines on the open market would have had a dramatic impact on the financial health of our family.

The other thing I learned early about diabetes was that it often leads to complications and other diseases.

The eating habits in our family

My father was a food lover - He relished whatever he ate.

This was despite knowing full well that his eating habits were the primary cause for his fluctuating blood sugar levels and diabetes diagnosis.

As he grew older, he steadily gained weight. But as he was working and had an active lifestyle, this balanced things a little. Even so, as a family we had to keep a strict eye on him if there were sweets around – He would eat them if we didn’t.

Looking out for my father meant that as a family we also started avoiding sweets, sugary drinks, and anything else that would increase my father’s blood sugar level. If someone gave us sweets on any festive occasion, we’d typically keep them in the refrigerator and eat them only rarely.

It became a habit in our family, and even to this day we avoid sugary things as much as possible.

My father’s fluctuating blood sugar level

When my father was working, while his blood sugar levels were on the higher side they were still manageable. But once he took voluntary retirement (after a heart attack), his blood sugar levels started to fluctuate a lot – This was because as he wasn’t working anymore his lifestyle had become less active.

I still clearly remember the shock we received when his fasting blood sugar level crossed 400 mg/dl for the first time (a nondiabetic’s sugar level is typically less than 100 mg/dl).

Doctors recommended immediate hospitalisation and 2 insulin shots a day, but my father refused and decided to stay at home.

At home, my father was forced to change his eating habits. He drastically cut down on sources of carbohydrates (like rice, potato, and sweets), and even his favourite fish or chicken curry. He began eating only 2 rotis for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And as a family we made it a point to remove potatoes and other carb-heavy foods from our own meals, to avoid them falling onto his plate by chance.

My father put himself on this strict diet until his fasting blood sugar level returned to his normal level (which was over 200 mg/dl). Once it was back in that range, my father returned to his normal eating habits, even though we did our best to help him control his diet.

Living like this, his condition steadily deteriorated. His fasting blood sugar level reached 400 mg/dl a few more times, and once even reached 470 mg/dl.

Still, my father refused to be hospitalised or to take insulin shots – Instead, he decided to stay at home and do whatever he could to avoid taking insulin.

Taking the same medicine, over and over

Most of the time, when he was working and again when he retired, my father was being prescribed the same medicine. We argued with doctors to change his medicine, and see if a different medicine could help manage his blood sugar level better or improve his condition, but they refused – They said as he was leading an inactive lifestyle, there was no point in changing his medicine. What if introducing a new medicine affected his diabetes and took it from bad to worse?

So, he was prescribed the same medicine repeatedly.

Only after my father’s fasting blood sugar level reached 400 mg/dl did the doctors finally decide to change some of his medicines – (I think they should have tried to change his medicine even before that, when he had an active lifestyle, as it wasn’t having the desired effect.)

Once they put him on a medicine that removed virtually all the fat from his body and made him look skinny. Even when we complained it was too much, they refused to stop that particular medicine. It was only after his blood pressure fell drastically that they decided it might be because of that medicine, but by that point, the damage was already done.

Attempting to lead a normal life

Eventually, my father realised that his sedentary lifestyle was affecting his health and, in turn, his family.

By that point, we had to help him move around, constantly holding his hands – We even had to take him to the bathroom.

Though very late, he tried to address this and adopt a more active lifestyle. He started going on walks in the morning and evening and watering the plants twice a day.

At this point, I learned about a magnetic therapy homoeopathic treatment for diabetes, and I recommended he try it. We approached a homoeopathic practitioner, who said he knew of the treatment but had never tried it before – My father was his first patient.

My father’s magnetic therapy did seem to help somewhat, but didn’t make a major change in his overall health. Homoeopathic medicine is often said to work slowly, but my father decided to stop after about 1 year.

Thanks to his high blood sugar levels, my father’s condition wasn’t improving. He started losing his balance on his morning walks and falling on the road. Good Samaritans helped him get up and get home, and my mother began to join him on his walks.

But as his condition worsened he started bending forward and, after a while, he had to stop going on walks altogether.

Diabetes leads to other diseases

There’s a reason diabetes is known as a ‘silent killer’ – More often than not it can lead to other diseases.

Once, my father developed a carbuncle (an infected hair follicle) high up on his thigh. The doctors said it was caused by his diabetes, and it took almost 6 months to cure.

We were warned that one day his diabetes would lead to an even bigger disease.

And that did happen. In the last few years of his life, my father was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease.

With Parkinson’s, it became increasingly difficult to handle my father, even with daily activities like shaving his beard or brushing his teeth. He became more and more dependent on others, and my mother and sister as his primary caregivers faced a harder and harder time taking care of him – It was very difficult handling such a heavyset man, even with all the weight he had lost.

In the end, Parkinson’s kept him bedridden for the last couple of years of his life, and in 2006 we lost him.

Final thoughts

I saw my father suffer from diabetes my entire life.

I strongly believe that if the doctors had changed his medicine (instead of repeating it month after month, year after year), his condition could have changed for the better.

As for me, having seen someone take so much medicine throughout my life, now the mere sight of medicine petrifies me. So I try to stay fit, eat healthy food, go on daily walks, and avoid taking medicine unless it’s absolutely necessary.

This has always been my routine, and I seriously hope I never get diabetes.

Around my mid-20s, I also made it a point to start getting my blood sugar level checked at least twice a year.

The thought of becoming a diabetes patient worries me, and I don’t want to ever become dependent on others, like my father was.