How to manage the emotional challenges of diabetes

Living with diabetes feels like a never-ending journey.

It’s not just about checking blood sugar levels, taking insulin, or following a strict diet – It’s also about managing the emotions that come with it.

With my mother (a type 2 diabetic), I’ve seen first-hand how overwhelming it can be. The feelings of guilt, frustration and helplessness can be exhausting.

But here’s the thing – These emotions don’t have to control your life.

I’ve learned that by understanding them, acknowledging them, and finding healthy ways to cope, you can make your diabetes journey easier.

Here are my thoughts on how to deal with guilt and frustration while managing diabetes:

Understand the emotional impact

When my mother was diagnosed with diabetes, her biggest worry was that she would have to give up sweets – She ate something sweet with her tea every day and used to say, “If I don’t eat something sweet, my day feels incomplete!”

And her reaction the first time she tried sugar-free sweets was priceless – “This doesn’t taste like a real sweet at all!”

The hardest thing for her was controlling her cravings. Over time, she learned to adapt, finding healthier alternatives that satisfied her without badly impacting her sugar levels.

But finding sweet alternatives wasn’t the only change my mother struggled with. She had to change her entire way of living. And that took a toll.

I remember one evening, she looked at her glucose meter with disappointment and sighed. “No matter what I do, my sugar levels never stay stable.”

That was the moment I realised diabetes wasn’t just about managing numbers. It was an emotional journey filled with guilt, frustration and self-doubt. It’s easy to feel trapped in a cycle of numbers (blood sugar readings, carb counts, insulin doses, etc.). And some days, it feels like no matter how hard you try, things still don’t go as planned.

But when emotions take over, self-care becomes harder. Skipping meals, ignoring sugar spikes, or feeling too exhausted to take action – It all adds up.

That’s why it’s important to address these feelings. Not ignore them.

Recognise depression and anxiety

Did you know that people with diabetes are more likely to experience depression and anxiety? I didn’t realise how strong this connection was until I saw it for myself with my mother – Constantly worrying about sugar levels, the long-term effects, and the never-ending routine took a noticeable toll on her mental health.

So look out for these common signs:

• Feeling down or losing interest in things you once enjoyed.
• Constantly worrying about blood sugar levels.
• Feeling exhausted, even after a full night’s sleep.

If you notice these signs, as I did with my mother, know you're not alone. And it’s okay to ask for help and invest time and effort in your emotional well-being.

Acknowledge that stress affects blood sugar

One day, out of habit, my mother absentmindedly ate a gulab jamun. As soon as she realised what she’d done, her eyes widened in panic – “My sugar levels will spike now, right?”

The whole family then had to try to calm her down. My father managed it by joking, “Just run a marathon now, it’ll balance out!”

It was a funny moment, but at the same time, it highlights the deep stress and concern my mother’s diabetes causes for her.

Thankfully, over time, she did learn and accept that one mistake won’t ruin everything – With balance and discipline, things can be managed.

One thing I’ve learned is that stress and blood sugar are deeply connected. Whenever stress levels rise, blood sugar levels tend to follow. It’s frustrating because it can feel like stress is controlling everything.

It happens because stress triggers hormones like cortisol to be produced, which increases blood sugar levels. And the more you stress, the harder it becomes to control your diabetes, and the more you stress about it… creating a vicious cycle.

How can you break this cycle? Here are a few techniques which helped my mother:

• Deep breathing exercises – Just a few minutes of slow, deep breaths can be enough to help calm your nerves and lower your stress.
• Mindfulness and meditation – Regularly meditating and practising mindfulness is a game-changer and can help embed calmness in your daily life.
• Physical activity – Even small amounts of physical exercise, like taking a short walk, can help reduce stress and stabilise sugar levels.

Decode diabetes-related guilt

As well as watching out for and managing stress, you should also look out for diabetes-related guilt.

Sometimes, when my mother has a particularly strong craving, she may eat a small piece of sweet. But she then feels immediately guilty about it – We have to reassure and remind her that one mistake won’t ruin everything.

And it’s important to do this, because diabetics can feel responsible for every little choice they make, and the guilt can be overwhelming (even when it’s not necessary or justified).

It’s easy to think, “I should have eaten better,” or “I should have exercised more.”

But that doesn’t help you – Be kinder to yourself.

Tame diabetes-related frustration

Frustration is inevitable. No matter how hard you try, there are days when nothing seems to work – Blood sugar levels fluctuate, your body feels drained, and the mental load becomes overwhelming.

For my mother, the unpredictability of diabetes is the biggest source of frustration. The same meal one day keeps her sugar levels stable, while the next day it causes a spike.

It’s frustrating, but it’s also part of the journey.

But diabetes is unpredictable, and even when you do everything ‘right’ things may not go as expected – So be less hard on yourself.

• Accept that fluctuations happen – No one has perfect control over diabetes.
• Focus on what you can control and think about long-term progress – Don’t stress over one bad test.
• Talk about it – Bottling up frustration only makes it worse. Instead, talk about it and share your troubles with someone who understands and can help.

Embrace self-care

Rather than feel guilty, frustrated or stressed, it’s important to be kind to yourself. Remember:

1. Progress matters more than perfection.
2. Mistakes don’t define you – How you respond to them does.
3. Self-care leads to better health, both mentally and physically.

And if guilt, stress or frustration start creeping in, pause, take a step back, and remind yourself that managing diabetes is an educational, ongoing journey – Every day is an opportunity to do better.

Practical strategies for building emotional well-being

Embracing self-care isn’t the only tool available to help support your mental health.

Here are some others I use with my mother to support her mentally and emotionally:

Establish a support network – Connect with others who understand

One of the best tools I’ve seen both at work and at home for building emotional well-being is networking.

Whether it’s friends, family, or a support group, having people you can connect with who truly understand what you’re going through can make a huge difference.

No one should have to navigate diabetes alone.

Practice mindfulness and stress reduction techniques

Mindfulness helps my mother and me manage our emotions better. It’s a simple practice, but can bring so much peace.

Here are some easy starting points:

• Gratitude journaling – Write down 3 things you’re grateful for each day.
• Guided meditation – Use apps like Headspace and Calm to meditate and reduce stress.
• Slow, mindful eating – Pay attention to every bite, improving both stress management and digestion.

Set realistic goals and celebrate small wins

It can be easy to focus too much on long-term goals and forget to recognise or celebrate the small achievements.

But small wins matter!

• Checked your sugar levels on time? – That’s a win.
• Chose water over soda? – Another win.
• Managed your stress better today than you did yesterday? – A definite win.

Recognising small victories can make your diabetes journey feel less frustrating and more rewarding.

When to seek professional help

If feelings of guilt, frustration or sadness become overwhelming, you should seek professional help.

There’s no shame in reaching out – Mental health is just as important as physical health.

Here are some of the signs that could suggest you need professional support:

• Constant feelings of sadness or hopelessness.
• Loss of interest in things you once enjoyed.
• Feeling exhausted, even when you’ve had proper rest.

And remember, seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness – It’s a sign of strength.

Final thoughts

Managing diabetes is a challenge. But it’s also an opportunity to adopt a healthier lifestyle.

My mother says, “Earlier, I used to eat whatever I wanted without thinking. But now, I take better care of my health and I feel more energetic than before.”

For her, diabetes hasn’t just been about restrictions and limitations. It’s also helped her take steps forward toward a healthier life.

And she’s learnt that managing diabetes isn’t just about controlling food and insulin. It’s about getting in touch with her emotions. Guilt and frustration are natural, but they don’t have to control her life. By embracing self-care, breaking the stress cycle, and focusing on small wins, she’s found balance.